My husband Bill and I were at a party, I was wearing a black dress.

I said, “shall we take this gown for a spin on the dance floor?”

It was as though it was another entity;

Bill, me and the dress.

Notice what we call the ‘floating head syndrome’ in the first picture. Then how easy it is to connect with Katie in the second photo.

In Paris the fashion trend is black with an accent color.  In NewYork its just black on black. These two locations are in part where we get our styles.

How did this happen? How did black become the ‘go to’ color?  Maybe we just aren’t really looking at ourselves? 

Some of creation is black and looks perfect

There is a knowing on some level for all of us if clothing is making a statement that is not true.
I knew this at that dance, but didn’t know back then how to do anything about this ‘rule of black’ that dominates all areas of clothing, not only cocktail dresses.

Maslow wrote about a hierarchy of needs: 
After basic physical and safety needs are met, fitting in and belonging come next.  So, if everyone wears black we will all fit in. I wore a uniform in high school and it was a good equalizer. I don’t miss it though.

If we move up the hierarchy of needs we bump into a problem. Esteem and actualization are the final two goals in our human development.  We make these goals harder for ourselves when we disappear into a color that doesn’t support us. (Again there is a small population that can and needs to wear black but it is at most 25%, a little more if we include an off- black for natural hair color matching.)

I would like to challenge you to look in the mirror, close your eyes then open them to see what you see first, your outfit or you. 
If the answer is your outfit or I don’t know then please contact me so we can have a conversation about image and how you can be your best self.